At 5’ 5”, even I could have just died when I saw this. I reached my absolute peak, height wise, in high school. Oh I continued to grow all right, the wrong way but then quickly rectified it after my twenties just like a mini version of “The Biggest Loser” show. When you’re only 5’ 5” tall, growing the wrong way can be a disaster. Can anything really help someone learn how to get taller naturally? There are exercises, products… Ooh and of course the Marquis De Saad’s rack. But do they really work?
The keyword here is ‘naturally’
What exactly constitutes natural? Natural herbs and supplements! Well, they’re out there. Exercises! Yes they are out there too. Once you go so far as to claim that a pill taken once a day can make you grow taller faster… You’re out of the realm of natural.
What’s so bad about short?
I ran across a web page that was for people who want to get taller. After all these years I’ve grown accustomed to my height, or lack thereof. After reading through this website’s content, I felt downright hateful toward myself. The site talks about how tall people are psychologically more confident than short people, how tall people can find careers more easily than short people; I think they even suggested that God hates short people but really loves tall people. Okay maybe not that far-fetched. But it really was degrading for people who are vertically challenged. Once it had you feeling true disdain for not so tall people, it informs you of a wonderful scientific discovery. I’m excited already! A scientific discovery? Awesome! What it boiled down to was good posture, proper nutrition, ‘grow taller’ exercises, recuperation and rest.
It’s all in what you eat
Supposedly, the required nutrition for getting taller consists of minerals, fats, vitamins, water, carbohydrates and proteins. What’s wrong with this picture? That’s what any healthy diet consists of? Are they kidding?
Moving along to exercise
I clicked on getting taller exercises hoping to find something a little more imaginative than the basic healthy diet recommended for growing taller. And how many exercises did I see? A whopping three! Three little exercises that could’ve saved me all this ridicule and being lesser than the tall people. Let me share with you:
- Exercise number one: Hanging. No, not the kind they did with Sadam Insane; hanging from your hands and dangling from a bar. No, not that bar; that’s where you’d find me. Drinking away my depression over being short. No, we’re talking about the kind of bar you find in a playground. Yup, just hang on for dear life and get taller. If only I’d known about this earlier.
- Exercise number two: A dry land swim. Well, this explains everything. We had a pool when I was growing up and I was constantly swimming. Above water, below water, you name it. Who knew that all that time I should’ve been doing it in the hallway instead? Now I find these things out.
- Exercise number three: Ready? The pelvic lift. Starting in a lying down position, you thrust your pelvis up into the air and back down again. Any further explanation is going to get me an X rating here. If you get the picture, and I’m sure you do, you may be blushing. Unless you’re a man like me.
OK, so a lot of that stuff is pretty funny really, but can you learn how to get taller naturally? A lot of websites claim you can. I’m a little past the point in life where I want to start trying, but there is one program where a lot of people are claiming success. It’s called Grow Taller 4 Idiots ™ and if you’re serious about becoming taller, and getting all the perks that go along with it (you do know that tall people make more money don’t you?), then it’s probably worth at least checking out if you want to learn how to get taller naturally.